It’s December. Memories flood our minds of Decembers past. Some of us have incredible memories, Santa Claus, magical Christmas mornings, Grandparents visiting, and food we still cherish after decades of the same recipe over and over. How about the Christmas miracles of a gift, so we had enough money to make our children’s wishes come true for that one special present?
December 7, 1996, twenty-two years ago, I married my dreamy boyfriend. It was a short engagement. We were truly strangers. I had a twelve-year-old daughter and he had a son that was old enough to live on his own and an eight-year-old daughter. All of us strangers. All of us effected by broken marriages.
The Not-so Dreamy
The first year was rough. Can I get an amen on the first year of marriage?! We made it through the first year. If that weren’t enough, we were not only in our first year of blended family, we were also in second year of medical residency. Then we headed into high school and middle school during cardiology fellowship (3 hours away) which made us weekend married. And if that weren’t enough I might as well finish my bachelor’s degree.
I can honestly say, the only thing dreamy about this time in our life was FAITH. I was fully convinced that God’s promises were true. I had seen Him work miracle after miracle in my life and now in ours. There was no indication that my husband liked me. Sure, he liked what I cooked, he liked that he had a nice home to rest. On top of training he moonlighted on the weekends he was “home.” He sustained us beautifully through trying financial times. He provided well. I never thought he loved me. He was satisfied with me.
It had to get better.
I started learning more and more about faith:
Do not become sluggish but imitate those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.
Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
I have mentioned before, I memorized this scripture first:
Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.
I Believed God
was going to turn my husband’s thoughts toward me. Or maybe it was my mind believing I could be loved. Either way, I believed we could experience what the God of Abraham promised, and Abraham believed:
“in the presence of the God in whom he believed, who gives life to the dead and calls into existence the things that do not exist. In hope he believed against hope.” Romans 4:17
Partner in Faith
My sister and I (our faith walk is always together) decided to begin to call into existence our “Dreamy Boyfriends.”
If we spoke life into our marriages, called our husbands dreamy and treated them as such, then he (our dreamy boyfriends) would exist.
It’s about obedience, selflessness, hope, faith, love, respect, hard work, and prayer. Our marriage has been through fire. We have at times, run out of that fire coughing and singed. Through the trials we have learned, God is faithful and has given us more than we ever thought to ask.
Twenty-two years into our marriage and I can say my boyfriend it the dreamiest! We cheer for one another, we push, we have fun. We have joy in our years and we are looking forward to many more together.
We have friendships that encourage us and our relationship with the Lord. Let me tell you, this is so important.
There is always hope,